I decided to start blogging for many reasons, some of which I can’t even begin to articulate. But below I detailed a few reasons.

  1. I decided that I needed to do this as a small way to honor the life of my son. As if in some way I could share the impact he had on my life by sharing my story.
  2. As a place of support. Infertility, miscarriage, and loss can be such taboo topics that often times we stuff the pain down and therefore feel alone. I wanted to share my life and stories as a place where others can find hope and if nothing more at least where they can know they are not alone.
  3. To document my journey. I don’t believe this is where my story ends, though there were some days that in the midst of my pain and desperation I prayed for death. I know that this has only been a few chapters out of a very long book. I want to be able to look back and see where I came from and what God has done in my life. I know that my story will continue and we will be blessed beyond what we can think of.
  4. To help me cope. Because this is a taboo topic we don’t feel comfortable discussing our feelings even with our closest friends. Infertility and miscarriages throw us into deep pools of grief and confusion that we don’t know how to fully navigate. For me, writing helps me cope, it helps me put into words the complexity of my emotions.
  5. I wasn’t able to find many blogs from people that are still currently struggling/dealing with loss and infertility. I found blogs that deal with this topic at length but they are a little older and I wanted a real-time blog.

There is no agony like bearing an untold story inside you” – Maya Angelou

 

– JT

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